Brock Boyd

This is the first time anyone close to me has died. I never realized how precious life really is, until you see someone's life taken away. The realization that I will never see him again, I"ll never hear his goofy laugh, I'll never get to embarrass him in wal-mart, I'll never get to finger his hummus (inside joke) kills me. A week ago he was in my back seat making jokes and laughing. The part that bothers me the most is that he went to hell. I could've changed that, and I didn't. I'm still in shock that he is gone forever. I won't even see him in heaven. Everytime I think about this I can't help but cry my eyes out. I feel so gulity.

I worry about Shay, she's really depressed. Shay and Brock were so close. She's taking it pretty hard. Last night I just held her as she cried, I've never seen her cry, ever. It broke my heart. The shock and realization is unreal to her. This morning she called me and ask if Brock was really dead or if it was all a dream. He was the one person she truely cared deeply about, and he's gone.

I can't cry in front of her, it will just make it worst. Everything reminds her of Brock, it's really sad. We won't be able to make it up to Washington for his memorial this weekend, which bums us both out.

Brock was a wonderful friend. He always made Shay and I laugh. Just goes to show you life can be gone in a flash. You don't know where or when it's gonna happen. I will miss you so much my hummus/egging buddy.

R.I.P Bock Boyd

11-15-2009